bad to worse...

heh... keeping the tone and the mood of the other posts... I'm back here again... worse off than before. To top it all off school just kicked off today, with a new stock of crap and trouble. I guess I don't get to complain 'cause I decided to go to EVERY class we have... even the boring ones. Gotta snap out of this state some time, and maybe some mind labour would do me some good. Although I seriously doubt it. Leaving for the friggin college city again, tonight. So pretty happy about that. Back into that place, spending way too much time with myself, as my mind has time to drift to all kinds of weird thoughts that cut deep, open wounds, and screw my morale... It's not on a high level as it is, but with those thoughts it drops below 0. Cain said I'm a boring SoB for writing in this thingie only when I'm screwed, that I'll leave the impression that I'm constantly depressed... hmm... maybe I am, but then again, I hate this state, and try to get outta it constantly. I guess I have to change my thought pattern, from extremely pessimistic, to light optimistic... or SOMETHING. It's getting really old really fast, and nothing good comes from it. This place beats all the optimism and all the smile out of you... live here long enough and you end up like the rest of the 22 milion people... still living, but without a soul... the spark in their eyes faded, the smiles rusty and dull... Come to think about it, who gives a flyin' fart in space about the rest of the 22 milion ? The people I care about could be counted on my fingers... gotta run...
Right, so I'm back after 4h, to complete this damn entry and... heh I still have no time... gotta get some food, and catch bleeding train... prolly gonna edit this entry some other time... crap I hate this...